Sometimes, MS Just Stinks

When I was diagnosed with MS, I think every single neurologist I saw warned me about pregnancy. Mind you, I was 13 years old! Then, before Doug and I were married, my neuro talked through what pregnancy would be like with both of us. I would have to go off of the only MS medicine that has ever worked for me, let it get out of my system, and then try and get pregnant. Doug and I had planned carefully when we should move forth with a family, knowing that God held it all in his hands.

My last dose of Tysabri was taken in September. It would take three months for it to get out of my system, and it would be completely out by December. Mind you, my body has not been without medicine since 2006. But as I usually do, I push through all the MS-stuff that gets in my way. We didn’t really notice anything until the middle or the end of December. We found out weeks later that I had actually gotten pregnant by then! Yay!

I started a full-blown relapse about the beginning of January. Church ladies had been super helpful, but when my husband chose taking care of me above school, we knew something had to be done. Me, always in contact with my neuro, got on some steroids right away, but I was admitted into the hospital, where I could have constant care and not worry about silly falls. My parents were in Florida at a farmer’s conference thing, so the decision was made for me to go home with them the remaining of first trimester. Then, Doug could concentrate on school and not spend every spare moment worried about me, and I could have some more constant care by those who were there when the whole MS thing started.

Since I’ve been home, I got on another three-days of steroids, have actually seen my neuro at the Mayo Clinic, and saw my baby on an ultrasound! Each day I get stronger. You know, until the days I realized just how much I’d pushed myself the previous day. Then it’s back in a wheelchair and resting so that I can accidently push myself on another day. Tomorrow, I head back to the Mayo Clinic to see PT and OT. THEY will decide when I can head back, in a way. Can I take care of myself? Can I stand and not fall? Can I WALK and not fall?

It KILLS me to have to be here, waiting to get better. I’ve decided to DO something about it, though. I want to hold and to play with my baby when he or she is born. I have been putting off PT orders since I was diagnosed back in middle school. But now I have a reason to want to keep up doing what I still can. Daily stretching? Daily exercise? I‘ve been down this road before. What I do today may not be noticed by my body for days or even weeks. I may wear myself out too far and knock me down for a couple days. But Baby M.

Thank you all for the prayers that have been sent up on my behalf. Keep them coming! MS is nasty, and all my frustration toward the situation is aimed at that. But I AM getting better! Even on weak days, I notice things I can do that I hadn’t been able to do before. Stay well, my friends! I will write again sooner than later! ❤

Anna