Unboring is me, writing this story on the way to SuFu the other day. Prepare for awesomeness:
Once upon a time, there was a giant evil chicken. The Giant Evil Chicken would sneak up (as much as he could sneak up) and peck at the little people, causing them to run around frantically like…chickens. One day, the Giant Evil Chicken hid on an empty trailer and disguised himself as a Giant Chicken Mascot—you know, the ones that stand in front of some restaurant and say, “We serve chicken!” or in front of a school and say, “Go Fighting Chickens!” You get the idea. Well, the Giant Evil Chicken waited to make his move until the truck that was pulling the trailer was on the interstate. His evil chicken eyes followed the minivan that they were passing, already coming up with a perfect pecking plan.
MEANWHILE…on a farm not too far from said interstate…the Giant Awesome Puppy Dog’s ears perked up—he smelled scheming. Tongue lapping, he ran to the interstate and leaped over it.
(By now, just so you know, all residents of said minivan are pretty much freaking out)
As the Giant Evil Chicken lifted his beak to gain momentum to peck through the minivan to get to the people, he saw the Giant Awesome Puppy Dog out of the corner of his eye. Just so happened, that the Giant Awesome Puppy Dog saw the Giant Evil Chicken as well. Giant Awesome Puppy Dog landed. Turned. Started growling. Giant Evil Chicken flapped to get out of the trailer. Got out. Got on the other side of the interstate. Cars slowed. Traffic stopped to watch the battle of Giant Evil Chicken versus Giant Awesome Puppy Dog.
Here are the highlights for those of you who missed the televised broadcast:
– Giant Evil Chicken challenged Giant Awesome Puppy Dog. Giant Awesome Puppy Dog jumped. Giant Evil Chicken flapped.
– Giant Awesome Puppy Dog barked. Giant Evil Chicken flacked, pecked. Giant Awesome Puppy Dog bit.
– Giant Evil Chicken ran away. Giant Awesome Puppy Dog followed. Much faster, I might add.
– Giant Awesome Puppy Dog won. Giant Evil Chicken lost.
And all lived in perfect harmony and enjoyed Giant Evil Chicken Wings.
But not before an unknown egg hatched, a brother to Giant Evil Chicken. But that’s for another story.
AKA: TO BE CONTINUED…